Moms Actually
Moms Actually is a motherhood community that aims to redefine motherhood and break away from the unhealthy expectations society has placed on women.
Our community provides spaces for women to authentically relate to each other in a society that often prioritizes appearances over genuine experiences.
We host a visual podcast that addresses the experiences of womanhood, sisterhood and motherhood through candid and transparent discussions We have discussed a range of topics, including marriage, dating, single motherhood, body image, miscarriage and child loss, blended families, the impact of social media, entrepreneurship, mental health and much more.
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Moms Actually
MA Top 12: Love to See It (S2 Ep.5)
Hey Ma! We’re hitting rewind and spotlighting our "MA Top 12" — the standout episodes from our first three seasons of Moms Actually. From October 12 to December 28, don’t miss the moments that defined us. Join us as a we take a trip down memory lane as we prepare for Season 4.
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We are unraveling the complexities of social media and its ever-growing influence on our everyday lives, parenthood, and mental health. From the pressure to post frequently and keep up with trends, we discuss our tendency to compare ourselves with others on these platforms and how it influences our habits, buying decisions, and parenting styles.
We are exploring:
- The dichotomy of social media as both a beneficial and detrimental tool.
- The importance of parental blocks, setting appropriate age limits for children
- The significance of open communication to safeguard them. The impact of celebrities and influencers shaping social media trends, creating a skewed perception of success and beauty.
- The addictive nature of social media and its myriad benefits.
- Acknowledging how social platforms have bridge gaps, connecting us with friends, families, and enabling us to reach people worldwide.
- The potential of social media to kickstart your dreams and passions,
★ New Episodes are released on Thursdays on YouTube and Podcast Platforms.
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Welcome back to mom's, actually where motherhood meets sisterhood. So I am Stupa Rush, I'm Blair and I am Morgan. And today we are discussing social media. So before we jump into our topic, we're gonna play a game. You guys already know we are diving into it's giving motherhood. So the gold side is yes yes. And the white side means no, and then, if you're in between, a little bit of a maybe.
Speaker 2:Yeah, right, yeah, first answer, the right answer, always, always.
Speaker 1:So I'm gonna go ahead and start. Do you think social media is helpful? Yes, yes, yes, yes, 100%. Do you think social media is harmful? It can be. It can, yes, yes. Do you find yourself comparing yourself to others on social media?
Speaker 2:certainly yes.
Speaker 1:For sure, just gonna keep it right, yeah. Do you feel like social media influences your daily habits and purchases?
Speaker 3:Sometimes it depends yeah what like movement the season Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:Okay. Have you made close friends from social media? Yes. Do you get your news primarily from social media?
Speaker 3:Yes, yeah, I even use Facebook. Yeah, do you really? Facebook has a news.
Speaker 2:I didn't know that was a thing you know I'm the oldest you.
Speaker 3:I am a Facebook user.
Speaker 1:I use TikTok now to get my news. Oh yeah, use the hashtag. Oh Okay, jesus yes, do you find yourself mindlessly scrolling on social media? Be more than you would like.
Speaker 3:Yes, 100,000%. Yes.
Speaker 1:Do you take social media breaks for your mental state?
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, not as often as I should. Yeah, that's a good one.
Speaker 1:Do you feel like you have to post often and keep up with trends Sometimes?
Speaker 3:yeah, I feel like I don't yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I'm gonna hear last one. Do you feel a pressure and how you parent because of social media?
Speaker 3:No kind of kind of have my, it's the same as the last one, like, yeah, like I see it and I want you, but then I still do this, yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's a good point. Mm-hmm Well, can you elaborate on that though? Like why? Why is it that you feel like Okay?
Speaker 3:like it makes me feel like I should be cooking, like when I cook, oh, I should have my kids so that they can learn how to do it. I should, you know, be in the playroom playing different games and engaging them. Yeah you know, like Creating different ways for them to learn, and just being like, yeah, and I'm like, oh, that's so cool and I'll save it, and I'll save it and I'll screenshot it, and then, mm-hmm, yeah, it don't happen.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I do, I save a lot of stuff. I'm like that too. I know I answered no, but I am like that too. I'm like, oh, that's a great idea. Yeah, but I don't feel like. I think a lot of the things that I see when it comes to social media is like how you should parent, or like what you should say versus what you should not say. I see that a lot.
Speaker 3:I try that too.
Speaker 2:And then, yeah, for me it's just because I'm like everybody's kid is so different so I don't feel like I should take their advice. And then the things that I do see, when it comes to like people organizing really nice and all the stuff, then I think like, do they do this every day, or is it just like what they do once or twice a week?
Speaker 3:You know what I mean?
Speaker 2:I'm gonna show them the clean part and then they'll be like but I'm like yeah, so like because I know that, and maybe it's also because we all do social media to a certain extent on a very full time basis. So it's kind of like I know what it is, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1:So I'm kind of like but I will say that it has helped me to become more disciplined. What I post, I live it out, so like when I am organizing. Oh, certainly, oh so it makes you do those things that you want to do. It's not because I'm pressured into doing those things. It's like I want to be able to help inspire other people to create structure and like to have systems, because I didn't have that with Harlem and I was letting him stay up to 11 o'clock at night.
Speaker 3:Like he was just kicking it.
Speaker 1:So like there was no structure and our household was all over the place chaotic. But now that we have structure, everything just runs so smoothly. So that's why I think some of us I'm not saying everybody, but some of us post those things to like other moms be like okay, we can do this yeah.
Speaker 3:I think that's helpful. But I think, like what you were saying, like the things that you say to your kids, that's the hard one, because there's so much and I'm like okay, so I can't say this, and I say this and I think my brain just goes into overload and then it just like combust and then I just go back to saying what?
Speaker 3:I would normally say. And then I'm like you know, it's back to what I usually say Like you're going to screw them up somehow. So I'm like saying my child is smart is like the wrong thing, Like I'm just going to have to die on that one.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I'm saying like I think there's balance too, because I feel like we all said like yes, no, maybe you know I said maybe to a lot of different ones, but it's because it's like social media is a part of our everyday life. It is literally like an all day, everyday thing, no matter how we try to spin it, no matter how many times we try to act like we don't mindlessly scroll, it is literally a part of everybody's life, which is why this is even an episode.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean.
Speaker 3:We are on social media. Yeah, we're on social media.
Speaker 2:Like it's a big topic and I will say like we sometimes I feel like we kind of talk about the cons of it, but what would you guys say as the pros?
Speaker 1:The pro? Well, for me, because it is my full time job. I am a full time content creator. It has literally changed my life. You know, I'm able to stay at home with my kids. I'm able to create a lifestyle that I want. You know I have the resources, the finances to create that, you know lifestyle. So it's really changed my life. I've met some amazing people via social media, but like also just my community I met as well. So those are the pros. And then also getting to reach other people far like in different countries. That part is so cool. Tell me about Jesus. Like that. It's so cool to me. I'm like you're all the way in the UK, you're all the way in Africa and you're like yeah, that part is cool, I love that part.
Speaker 2:Yeah, what would you say? B?
Speaker 3:No, I love the part that people get to share so many different stories Like people, like things you've never heard of you're going to learn about strategies people talking about motherhood, postpartum.
Speaker 3:You know relatable things. Where you're before, you were like I'm the only one and you're like, okay, well, there's at least one other person out there now that's done it. So it's like just being able to hear so many stories, the fact that news can trans like transfer so fast. Now you don't have to wait for, like a morning newspaper or for someone to write an article, so we can control narratives you know a plus yeah.
Speaker 3:But like information can be shared so fast and I just think you can find community like during the pandemic, before social media didn't exist, you know how like lonely, oh gosh, that would be like it's already a lonely situation, but you're still able to communicate. You're still able to like, have community.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:So I just think communication, news, information, transparency is just opened up the world even bigger. And then made it this small.
Speaker 2:Yeah, do you guys ever feel like it could be affect yourself esteem at all when it comes to social? Because we talked about comparing yourself and like you see all of these things and we don't always do them. So then we feel like, dang, I did I fail or did I'm like, or like even comparing without the motherhood side, just as a woman I know for me, I look at like people who've snapped back and I'm like, dang.
Speaker 3:They're spanned all the way up to their neck. Snap back, but some people do. Some people really do, though I mean so that's like I'm like man.
Speaker 2:Should I be doing more or should I be doing? Should I? I don't know I'm. I do start to get in my head a little bit sometimes because I do see, or if I'm seeing, I'm really into like fitness and so if I see people like at the gym every single day and I miss today, I'd be like oh, morgan, you really missed the mark today, Like they changed out.
Speaker 3:It's also media halfway, but no, I understand. But I think the good thing is for everything. You see like that. You'll also see personal trainers that aren't you know thin or muscly. Like you'll, see people work out all the time or people who haven't snapped back. So for every story that you see that can make you feel bad, you can also see one that normalizes that's true. Your own story, and I think it's just where you decide to water yourself on social media, do you?
Speaker 1:want to torture yourself, or do you?
Speaker 3:want to be empowered on social media. So you have the power to control your experience.
Speaker 2:That's such a good point because just a tip for anybody who has the same issues that I have had I literally unfollowed all the unrealistic expectations, so like, even if it was like too aspirational like the people when they say, do we even see real houses anymore? Like that type of thing, like I started unfollowing like stuff that was like too much, it seemed a little bit out of my reach because I was just like, at this point it's just gonna make me feel like I'm always, you know, inadequate. So I started to even follow like people that don't have my same body type and that are fitness people. I'm like that's unachievable. Find someone who is your body type and then you can be inspired, get the workouts that you wanna get. Like.
Speaker 2:I started doing that because that is what helped me. The like cause, like you said, it's still a good. Yep, the algorithm still shows you more, and I think that that's what we have to start doing is, instead of like trying to downplay social media, because we all use it, like, find the way it works for you. You know what I mean, for sure, I use it for inspiration.
Speaker 1:So, like you, I don't really follow I don't follow a lot of celebrities cause I don't relate to their lifestyle, but also, like I really just follow people that inspire me to be a better person. So, yeah, I just I keep it pretty simple, yeah.
Speaker 3:I do too. I follow my friends in like regular things. Like you know, they set it up so you see the Explorer page more and more and more, so you end up seeing other stuff. But for the most part I just try to look at regular stuff. But then when I get to scroll and I see all text stuff, everything. Yeah, you follow down on rabbit hole. I do A lot of people popping videos. That's my favorite.
Speaker 2:Oh God, that is a serious favorite.
Speaker 3:There's a space for it. There is a space for it.
Speaker 2:What is your like? Weird obsession, she's the pimple popper video.
Speaker 3:What's yours? What catches your?
Speaker 1:eye when you I love ducks. Oh what, that's weirder than the pimples. No, there's this page on Instagram that is like baby ducks or like ducks, like chicks, and they like put them in like the bathtub or like they have them, just I don't know. They're just really cute and friendly. They make me smile. I love it. Yes.
Speaker 2:I have a couple, but I like when people restock but, the ones with the sound on.
Speaker 3:Oh, like ASMR.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but it's like when they restock and organize, Just click everything. Yeah, I like those. And then the cleaning the rugs.
Speaker 3:There's a oh no, that's the rug cleaning ones. I don't go down the rabbit hole, but I see them.
Speaker 2:I get it so good. I love cleaning. Anything like cleaning is I like cleaning ones. It's like man, I'm like. I feel like I did.
Speaker 3:I did my house You're like like rug is clean now. Mom is done. Just don't look down.
Speaker 2:Now, when it comes to social media, this is the big question, because we're all mothers here. What age is too young to have a social media account, and when do you think you're going to like let your kid you know, go for it.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's a hard one, I think. For me it's just I don't know. It's really hard Because my kids are going to be in sports one day. Oh, certainly I may give them a phone in junior high just so that they can communicate with us. But I didn't have social media until I was in college. So it was oh yeah, I know, and then I got into it. It's weird.
Speaker 3:But yeah.
Speaker 1:I got it whenever I was 21. I got my first Instagram account, yeah, wow. So I See, but I'm not as cultured as some of y'all Like.
Speaker 2:I just feel like I'm out of the woods. Nobody's everybody's like have you ever heard you be like no, never heard of it.
Speaker 1:Okay, I didn't know that we find out the thing she's like.
Speaker 3:The 90% of the world was not accessible today, really Like I live in my world.
Speaker 1:Yeah, okay, this makes sense, but Anthony had a phone when he was like nine, cause he's like sports. So I think for us we just gotta have to figure out a balance of like.
Speaker 2:Let's see there's a difference between having a phone and having social media, because my daughter she's 10. And she's actually had her phone since she was maybe like seven. And it's only because we co-parent, so it's easier. But she does not have any social media accounts and she has, like all the parental blocks in her phone and all that stuff. So she does have an Instagram, but I run it yeah she does, it's so sweet.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I follow what. I think. I'm not gonna say it all on the show, but I don't know. I go back and forth and then you gotta think about what are you considering? Social media like they're on YouTube, kids. That's social media they play like my daughter. She's five. I don't know if that's too young.
Speaker 3:They play Roblox and I've heard you can talk to people through there so it's like you have to pay attention to that. And then I go back and forth between, okay, if I wait too long, kids are kids, they find a way. Or can I go through this process with them, like, hey, let's start it together?
Speaker 2:That's what I did with the TikTok.
Speaker 3:Let's post a picture here. Let's do this together and it's like a together thing and then they grow up in it. But I don't think it's gonna be like in when you're 14, okay, you can do it, Because I feel like now you're starting it with your peers.
Speaker 2:So with Layla, she wanted to TikTok really bad and instead of giving her the TikTok, I basically was like nah, we can do it together, cause with TikTok you just can't control what shows up, and I didn't like that and so I turned it into something that we could do as a mother-daughter thing that she could look forward to, and it was really cool and she really does look forward to it, like we do TikTok Tuesdays.
Speaker 2:So when she comes, home from school she's like mom, it's TikTok Tuesday. And now that she's getting older, I'm not gonna lie. When she does find different dances and things like that, she will say like okay, well, that was fun. Can I do this one by myself? She don't want to do that.
Speaker 3:Yeah, sometimes she'll scoot me out, and that's fine, Cause I've already pre-screened the dance.
Speaker 2:We're not scrolling, we're doing. You know, we're using the right audio and all those things, and so there's no problem with it. And I that's my like compromise if you will.
Speaker 3:That's so cute. That's a good idea too, and that's what I'm saying. I think it's a place to be creative on.
Speaker 1:like you know, learn to edit learn to do all of these things. She sees me do it, yeah.
Speaker 3:And they see us do it, but you can't, you know, but you can't do it. So I think it's just how you introduce it Like most things like I said my kids would never use iPads. I ended up letting them use it early. But, now they're not obsessed with iPads. They can literally have them in the corner and like never touch them all day because it's not something like oh, this mysterious thing I can't touch. So I just think it depends on your lifestyle, no matter how you bring it in. I think it's really together.
Speaker 2:That's a good point. What about you? Your kids are a little well Bully. What would you like? Do you feel like you're?
Speaker 1:I feel like I would let them have. I mean, they're on social media regardless because I post them, but like for them to be introduced to it, I think I don't know. I feel like I would just have to monitor everything, Kind of like what you guys are saying, Like I would have to make sure that I'm okay with what they're about to post, Cause I think a good example are the Kardashians because they're like they.
Speaker 2:I don't know it's. Hold on, hear me out.
Speaker 1:So they have TikToks with their kids and they monitor everything that they turn the comments off they do. There's not. There's access to them, but not access to them. I think that's really smart and I think social media has set that up Like they have monitoring.
Speaker 3:I feel like Instagram added something where you know they did for the youth, so it's just you know it can be really helpful. But then it's like I just feel like we're talking about Instagram and TikTok and in five years there's gonna be something else. And then kids also. Now they post like 10 pictures. Then all of a sudden they got one picture. Oh my gosh, that is the new inner brain, youth don't keep the pictures up. That's true? Yeah, they don't. They just really are looking at stories.
Speaker 3:And like they'll post like once in a while, like they're really like the king and queens of scrolls. I don't even think they like anything.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's true. I would say too, though, out on the other hand, of like just making sure what they are exposed to is what am I exposing, like my child to? On the other end, as far as the people are so mean People are so People are so Trust me and they find anything to pick apart, and so I'm like. What I don't want is to, which is why I run, you know, my daughter's account Like she doesn't look at comments, she doesn't even know what it looks like. If anything. I'm like ooh Leigh, like your video just hit a million views. Like I'll say that to her. But other than that, that's it because people are like well, why is your hair like that? Or why did you? There was one video that's like oh, you're too grown. I can't believe your mom lets you do like. I'm like bye.
Speaker 3:See, that's the thing I'm worried about, and I think about it more for my daughter, because I am a woman, not to say boys don't have issues, but I worry about the opinions of others, like when we were younger, or at least when I was a young girl. No batch y'all you know. I only had to compare myself to the people in my neighborhood and the people in my school, social media wasn't like a thing until, like, I got to college.
Speaker 2:Really.
Speaker 3:Like I think black planet started maybe in my senior year of high school or something like that. So I didn't have to like, compare myself, like, okay, you see a model, but like a model was so untouchable that it was like next level. I would say that's true for us too. But now you're on social media and it's like no filter. Yes, you got a filter on, yes, you have this on or you know, but everybody's no filter, no makeup. Or even if they do, you think that's what you're supposed to look like.
Speaker 1:You think that's normal now.
Speaker 3:And it just like scares me and it makes me sad that like, growing up like the comparison like bowl is now huge and if it's hard for us as adults not just looks but also like what people are doing and accomplishing, succeeding at. Can you imagine being 13, 12, 15 and having to compare yourself to the world?
Speaker 2:All of that, what do you do, though? That's the thing like we're talking about it, but it's one of those things is like what do?
Speaker 3:you do. I think it just started. I mean, it always starts at home. It's just conversations, it's setting them up for it's not real, or it's about accomplishments. I think it's just continuing to talk to them.
Speaker 2:It's just there's nothing else you can do.
Speaker 3:You build a strong foundation, like that's what I always say with my kids I'm building a strong foundation so they're homeschooled right now, so that if they go to school one you know a formal school one day. Or if they go to somewhere like they're strong enough to deal with it, or they're, or they know I'm there to talk to them about it. And I'm gonna talk to them like real about it.
Speaker 1:That's the only.
Speaker 3:Thing what can you do?
Speaker 2:You can't you're not a superhero, you can't be the world. Yeah, I would say that. What about you?
Speaker 1:The same thing. I would just over communicate and let them know like.
Speaker 2:Cause it starts at home. Yeah, it's just at home, Just bottom line. It starts at home and if you don't communicate at home, it's more of a reason for them to go looking for it somewhere else, cause I sure look for a lot of things when.
Speaker 3:I was young Because you know, it was so like between a boy or yeah, because that's where it starts, though you start with.
Speaker 2:I know for me, when I was younger AOL and like chats.
Speaker 3:I was probably talking to 90 year old man back then.
Speaker 2:I'm telling you that's, I didn't even know, but I literally I would be bored and I'm just like, oh, you know, like I'm just chatting with you Cause there were so many different chat rooms, I thought it was really cool but, like to be honest, like some of that stuff was Pretty dangerous because you didn't know who you were talking to and people are so dead going crazy and you know it was dangerous, but it was so like still kind of like new that you're just like who would do that?
Speaker 3:I mean yeah, so why wouldn't some? Why wouldn't this person be them?
Speaker 1:But yeah, I think people were just looking for community, and I think that's what we were. Well, back then, the chat rooms were the way to communicate, but now it's like DMs you can hit people up in DMs now Like yeah. And I think that's the scariest part with children. It's like these yeah.
Speaker 3:And the vanishing DMs. Now everything can disappear, yes, so that's weird.
Speaker 2:Which is weird? They set you up.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that location. You can get locations of where people are. Snapchat is scary, so I'm just saying if it's worrisome for us.
Speaker 3:it just makes me think about my kids and that's why I don't want them to be like introduced at an older age. I'm like, yeah, because like your brain definitely does, so what age do? You think you're going to do it. I don't know.
Speaker 1:I think whenever they're interested or whenever they ask about it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, Because I don't want to be like I've learned a lot, Like I'll say no sometimes I'm like why am I saying no Yep? Because it just seems like the right. So I think just saying yes and introducing it to them earlier and I don't know, and just be scared on the inside, I'm going to be scared.
Speaker 2:If you could change one thing about social media, what would it be?
Speaker 1:You can change one thing.
Speaker 3:Less stuff that could disappear. I think it just makes it so easy to hide stuff now.
Speaker 1:And I wish there was less ways to hide stuff.
Speaker 2:Or.
Speaker 3:I don't know, I'm not very creative in that way. That's the only thing I can think of. I just want them to be able to hide stuff.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's true, that's my big thing. What about in a positive way, like we talked a little bit in the beginning about the pros of social media, and like the community that you build, and like how we get our information. And like in the perfect world, like how, what would you like?
Speaker 3:for them to add how would social media better Like? I'm always like this, is it yeah?
Speaker 2:this is so great. They come out with an update every week.
Speaker 1:But I feel like they've done a great job at trying to help people's mental health. I mean, like you are the consumer, so you, it's your choice whether you're consuming or not consuming, yeah, but they've done a great job at hiding likes. They've done a great job at turning off your comments, if you need to turn off your comments. So I feel like they're trying to go in the right direction where they're limiting people's validation and exposure of like filling less than because they don't have this many likes or this many comments. So I think they're heading in the right direction.
Speaker 3:I think they do all that for marketing.
Speaker 1:I don't think so. I mean, they can't, but I feel like they don't think they care about it. I don't, I feel like they don't.
Speaker 3:Companies don't care about likes, they care about engagement. Bad comments affect marketing Like. I'm very cynical about that stuff.
Speaker 1:But you know what? I've never looked at it from that perspective. Yeah, but now that I think about it, yeah, I mean I'm very cynical.
Speaker 2:I watch that like Netflix special and I saw that basically all of social media is set so we can just sell stuff to each other.
Speaker 1:Like whether you're a formal influencer or not.
Speaker 3:And I don't think it's like a bad thing, but I think it's like I don't like the that again it goes to despair. I don't like the sneakiness about it. Like I don't like when they're doing it that way. I like the idea of like influencers Like this is what I'm doing and this is what I'm sharing, but, like for me, a normal person just being me, like I don't want to, I don't want to feel pressured. Like that. I'm being used that way.
Speaker 1:But am I going to get?
Speaker 3:off social media. No, no, they're going to keep using me.
Speaker 2:Well, we talked about even getting off social media. That was one of the questions. How often do you guys take your breaks?
Speaker 3:I did it Probably like I used to do it, like they'd have like a church blackout, but then you find some excuse, like I got to check it because it didn't feel like it was coming from, like my, like I want to do it. So the last time I did it was, I think, the top of 2021, but that's because I was at the time of stay at home mom and I was actually happy with it.
Speaker 3:But, every time I was scrolling on social media I was like this is not okay, I need to be doing something. This person has a business and this person's doing this, and even people I knew that really weren't doing something or really weren't successful at what they were doing, I was like it's still a good on social. So it still made me feel way I'd be like. That's not real, but I'm like, but it looked pretty good, but it looks real.
Speaker 3:And so I just felt so much pressure and I didn't want to like just do something, to do something. I was like I need to get off to get my brain right. So I got off for like a month and then when I got back on, it felt so good because I didn't have those like automatic triggers to like scroll and to check my phone. I would pick it up less and less and less and then all of a sudden like then you just back to normal.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, what about you? So I think, because it is my full-time job, it kind of makes it a little bit harder.
Speaker 2:Very.
Speaker 1:I don't feel. I don't feel the pressure that I have to post every day Like I create, when I feel creative.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yes.
Speaker 1:I mean, I haven't posted in a week and I'm okay with like not being able to like. I don't feel like I'm missing out, yeah, or like I'm not part of a trend, yeah, now, it hasn't always been like that. I've struggled in the past, like years ago like not even years ago, I would say last year, before that Like you'll disappear, but like, yeah, like people are going to forget about you, or you're not?
Speaker 1:like doing enough, like I feel like I'm in a different season of my life where I'm like you know, I'm okay with being on God's timing and not the rest of the world's timing.
Speaker 3:So yeah, Social media literally tells you you don't post every day you're going to be on the output. So it gives you that pressure. Yeah, and I'm glad you were like, hey, my content's good.
Speaker 1:My content is good.
Speaker 3:Come forward and don't yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:I take I used to take breaks way more, thank you. I would do every every January the whole month. I would the whole month every January. I would do it especially when I was in the corporate world because I had more of a choice. Now I'm pretty much all social media. It's literally like my job. So even though I don't post on my page as much because I'm posting on all these other accounts that I run, I end up, of course, I get my inspiration from different things and so I end up scrolling all the time. I feel like I'm always on social, even if it's not for myself. So I don't feel like I ever get to take a break. So that part honestly does stink, because I wish I would have times where I can just not be on social at all because it does, it stunts my creativity, especially like in the in the like Stunt it.
Speaker 3:But I think also, like you said, there's some things that can inspire thoughts.
Speaker 1:Oh, certainly yeah.
Speaker 3:Like things that thought like weren't even possible, like you see some people's transitions or the things that they post, or like seeing people like put their passion out there. I think that's always like.
Speaker 2:Oh all the time, which is what I love about it, but then I'm like I'm doing it every day, all day, nonstop. So I have one of the things I have done is like just trying to create a better rhythm for myself of like, okay, Morgan, like from this time to this time, maybe this is your time to just like not do anything at all, or pre-plan it so that you can like do something else in the meantime Weekends.
Speaker 3:I've done a lot better, but it's still like the time restriction on it before, and I would just be like I did that one.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I did that, I did that, I did that.
Speaker 3:I was like I'm the, and that did not work it didn't work, but it made me conscious of how long I was on there, because I was like, if it popped up, I was like, oh, I must have been on here a lot, but I would definitely just. But it was nice yeah.
Speaker 1:Nice thought. Do you guys have boundaries when it comes to social media, like you kind of like brought it up a little bit, but like yeah, is there.
Speaker 2:I would say my boundaries. Do you mean to what?
Speaker 1:I post no more, so just like like spending all your time on there, or like.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Not, so you don't feel overwhelmed or feel behind, or you know you're getting lost Whenever I catch myself, literally, literally times when I catch myself mindlessly scrolling or I'll like be working on something, and then I'll go to social to be like, oh, I saw this and this inspired me, what was it? And then all of a sudden I'm scrolling and doing something totally different. So then what I'll do is, when I catch myself, I'm like all right, I'm going to put my phone down all together and go do something else, and then I'll come back to it, just so that I can kind of get myself out of that.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you know, yeah, I'm not really on it all day, but I'm like on it so sporadically you can like equal up to so much time. So my boundary that I want that I always end up not doing but I'm like when I'm with my kids at lunch, when I'm with my kids like after dinner to their bedtime like two hours.
Speaker 3:I'm like not going on social media, like even if I'm just laying there, I just want to be like more present, yes, and then the next thing I know I'm like, oh, I need to, I thought of this, or you're on something else, and then your thumb somehow falls like, oh, how am?
Speaker 2:I Yep. I was like, how did I get here?
Speaker 3:Right exactly, I was literally in my calendar and now I'm scrolling, I'm scrolling, but I will say the one thing that I don't I rarely, rarely, rarely get on is TikTok, because that thing I love it.
Speaker 1:It is no, it's amazing, it's great, it's so amazing I can't stop.
Speaker 3:It's hard, it's like, because the algorithm is so smart and so fast.
Speaker 2:I go there for a laugh, oh my God, whenever I need to pick me up. It's incredible.
Speaker 3:But I have, like I guess like a binge personality in some ways. I literally can't stop. It's hard and like yeah.
Speaker 1:Do you guys feel addicted to social media Like, have you?
Speaker 2:No, because if I could, I would not be a bear.
Speaker 3:You're going to say what an addict. You're going to say an addict. I could stop anytime.
Speaker 2:Yeah, like I would literally if I could stop. When it comes to like, oh, I can say I'm not going to be up here for a week, oh yeah, I wouldn't.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I wouldn't. I don't think I'm addicted like a fiend, but I think it's become like I'm like you know, but it's a habit. It's a habit. It's literally like it takes a lot to break it. Like sometimes, when I'm just here, I'm like, oh, I just want to like look, and it's not like, oh, I need to be on social media. It's just my hands, my body, automatically does it.
Speaker 2:That's the key, Because I've been there before. When I do have the break, I'm like I actually don't. I have no reason to be up here right now. So, yes, it's like more of a habit that needs to be break.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I have nothing to check right now, so yes, no, I really felt like I was addicted to it. Yeah, presently or like either, or I mean a little bit of both.
Speaker 1:We're like I'm working because I'm in school right now, so I'm doing homework. So to help me, I set my timer for 30 minutes so I can focus on my homework, and then for like 10 minutes I take a break. And that 10 minutes I'm like scrolling. So I'm scrolling, I'm like looking on social just to take a break. But it's like. It's so like you get on it like automatically you wake up, you get on it, you go to the bathroom you go. It's made from that, though.
Speaker 3:It's, literally, it is, it's doing what it's supposed to do, yeah.
Speaker 1:I'm like this is really addicting.
Speaker 2:Even though.
Speaker 1:I don't want it Like, I don't want to be on my phone, but it's like the first thing I grab, the first thing, you know, when you go to the bathroom or like whatever. I just feel like it's always there, so accessible to everything, to everybody, you know.
Speaker 3:And I would say the best part about it. I know we talked about this before, but I just thought about it because I just had my 20 year high school reunion, yes, god, and I missed it, but you know the fun Sorry guys. I mean, I didn't even buy the tickets the day before I knew I was going, but I feel like I can and this can be a downside, but I feel like I can keep up with so many people.
Speaker 3:Like I feel I can talk to people I haven't seen in years or moved away, like I love being able to like stay in contact with my friends or, even if we're not, like talking on there, like I can see what people are up to. So I didn't go to my first high school reunion because I was like, oh, we got, I know what y'all doing.
Speaker 1:Why not like now show up, or what have you?
Speaker 3:So I think it's like. I like how it kind of makes the world smaller in that sense. Yes, I agree. Yeah.
Speaker 2:And you find out like who knows who.
Speaker 1:Oh, my God.
Speaker 2:One D'Corey Association family which is so crazy.
Speaker 2:Like you'll see somebody's like how this person liked this picture, but how does this person know this person? So that part is really cool, and I think even because I mean, let's be honest, this is what we do, but that is the part I love about it is the fact that, like you said earlier B we are able to give so much information, and it has become a resource to so many people, and even when we started this which we thank you guys so much for is people were like oh my gosh, this is not just me Like it gives people an opportunity to be real. It gives people an opportunity to say me too, you know, and that is like chess, kiss. What would you say, though, to a mom who maybe wants to start putting more content out? I see that a lot. They're like oh, I wish I could like do more content. I want to like do more stuff. What would you say?
Speaker 1:I would sell people who want to start doing social media. It's by tripod. It does not have to be expensive Literally $10, $15 on Amazon and set it up. That's really how I started. I was like I'm going to set this tripod up and I'm just going to document my life and it's kind of what I did and what I do now and I just post it.
Speaker 1:So that's what I would tell my mom Just go and just do it. Don't let the fear keep you from going after something you desire, like. If God put it on your heart to talk about motherhood or to do something that you're passionate about via social media, then just do it?
Speaker 2:Go for it, go for it. Yeah, do you have anything to add, or are you?
Speaker 3:like that's it. I would say. I keep saying I'm going to put a little camera in my car because that's where the gold happens.
Speaker 2:It does In the car. I'm telling you, that's my idea, take it.
Speaker 3:Take it Well, let us know what you guys think about social media. Is it used for good? Is it used for evil? What are your pros and cons? Let us know. But in the meantime, thank you for watching moms actually wear. Motherhood meets sisterhood.
